It’s not the comments/thoughts/personal beliefs that are an issue.  It’s the *way* that some are choosing to express themselves.

The group has long been a haven for those seek open-mindedness, no matter what their beliefs.  From diva mom to the crunchiest granola, from Wiccan to Christian to Buddhist and everything in between – we’ve got a WIDE range.  And we have long co-existed.

No one will be banned from the group.  Some will simply not have access to the four Members Only forums.  There are plenty of other places and topics to post. 

Health and Wellness will move to special topics, however the monthly check in threads will be moved to Members Only.  Something will happen to The Real Truth about Motherhood boards as well, I’m just not sure what that will be yet.

The group is meant to foster a community of support and encouragement among mothers.  The place to turn to when you are scared or anxious or just need a cyber hug.  Where you can voice your opinion and be met with open discussion without having to be put on the defensive.

The board is a place to supplement the friendships and connections made through meeting in real life – whether it is the main group playdate, or one that you set up privately with another mama.

Recently there have been quite a few members posting who are using the anonymity of the internet to say things in a way that they would likely not say in person.  And if they really would say it that way, well, no one wants to be around that kind of righteousness and judgement.

These can’t be pointed to one post or one topic.  It’s subtle but enough to run off less confrontational members from the boards who regularly come to playgroup armed with hugs and kindness.

Over the three years this board has been around, I have communicated with the most offensive posters.  Some left, some changed their tone because they didn’t realize how they were being perceived.  It’s the part of this volunteer job I hate the most.

It’s not a matter of being around the longest.  I have made some connections with some of the newest moms of the group, too. 

It’s not about coming to play dates every week, either.  There are moms I’ve met here only briefly, even just one time, that I have made connection with.

Lastly, those who might ask, who am *I* to make these decisions?

This is a labor of love.  I started this group because my two best friends with children moved out of town.  It was election year 2004, and I was suffocated by the oppressive conservatives moms in all the other playgroups I found.  I was tired of driving all over town.

I maintain the website, pay for hosting & bandwidth, give tech support to those who have trouble with the forum, organize playdates and get-togethers.  I moderate disputes, police the boards and try my damnedest to make sure this place stays a healthy community.

That’s who I am.  That’s why I make these decisions.

This is not easy for me.  My heart aches for the decisions I have to make.

Thank you to everyone who has posted and PM’d their support.  I appreciate it in ways that you can’t begin to know.